Sleepless Sierra.

'Ello poppet(s)!

I hate those times when you lie in bed and you're really tired but can't fall asleep. Yep, that is me right now.

I hate getting caught up in pointless emotion. I've just been realizing lately how it's really not about me at all... and never has been. I'm tired of living a life so revolved around me that I can't see what God wants for me.

God's just been fixing my perspective lately to see how small I am and how huge and magnificent and Holy He is. And when that happens, all these minute problems fade. They simply just don't matter. God deserves this of me: To surrender my emotions and my time into His hands.

This kind of seems like a repeat of my January 9th entry (I think that's when it was...) But I think I'll be getting these revelations often. I think every morning we have to wake up and fix our perspective again and again upon God and not on ourselves. It's incredible how amazing I felt when I posted that one on January whatever, and God still speaks to me over and over about that. I think often we have to be told numerous times for our tiny human brains to get it. "Sierra, I am Holy. You are mine. I am jealous for your heart. Now fix your eyes on me." And sometimes we get it the first time and our world is changed, but often God will repeat it again and again. How patient God is with us...


That seems very elementary. But my heart is realizing it. It's refreshing to feel not so caught up in the world to where all I can focus on is this moment and these emotions. At the core of it all, I want to know more of God and His plans for me instead of mine. I'm tired of wanting to control it.

"Oh that we might know the Lord, let us press on to know Him!"
-Hosea 6:3.

"A spiritual kingdom lies all about us, enclosing us, embracing us, altogether within reach of our inner selves, waiting for us to recognize it. God Himself is here waiting for our response to His presence. This eternal world will come alive to us the moment we begin to reckon upon its reality." -A.W. Tozer, The Pursuit of God.

I've been realizing this for awhile, and now I'm just writing it down. I want to live with an eternal perspective to see what God wants. That is all.

Gooooodnight.