White page keeps staring at me. Expecting me to type something profound.
Can I be honest with you?
I have nothing profound.
I have nothing but my small words and honesty- when oftentimes, all that amounts to is words on a page.
I am so okay with that.
I love that I am simple, honestly.
I resolve to honesty with myself.
With you.
I'm not perfect. I'm far from it, as most of my blog followers know.
Oftentimes I'm stubborn, emotional, vindictive, and very selfish.
But I have gifts God has given me and in the last little while I have been able to look at myself and really love and hate some of the parts I see. There are things about myself I will not sacrifice- they are part of me, they are who I am.
Allow me to be vulnerable. I'm learning a lot about myself. Give me some grace. I'm in a time in my life where everything will be changing, and everything already is. My actions reflect my heart. Confused, lonely, and unsure.
As much as I want my comfort, I've been absorbed in myself so much I didn't even notice and I'm sorry if I've hurt any of you.
But I will be changing myself.
I will be more caring, aware, loving, self-sacrificing.
I will be letting go of things and people that hinder me.
I will be less complacent and more disciplined.
I will resolve to know Christ, and if it comes with a price tag, I'm willing to let it hurt for awhile.
As I grow in godliness and maturity, maybe I will say something profound. And maybe I won't.
But the fruit of my life will reflect my heart.
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